


Bottled Up

by jisungsjheekies



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-14
Updated: 2019-11-14
Packaged: 2021-01-30 19:14:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21433306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jisungsjheekies/pseuds/jisungsjheekies
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Reader
Kudos: 20





	Bottled Up

Rainy days had always been a favorite of yours. The cool, calm atmosphere giving you a sense of peace, something you rarely had these days. Many unfortunate events had occurred recently in your life, making it harder and harder each day to keep going. Sometimes it felt as if life was trying to swallow you whole. Sometimes you just wished it would. You didn’t feel like yourself anymore. You hadn’t for a while. 

Every time something bad happened, you lost a part of yourself, leaving you to feel like nothing. Was it all worth it? You always asked yourself. You felt weak. You didn’t know how much more you could take. You wanted the pain to end, one way or another. But there was always that voice in the back of your head that told you to keep fighting and as much as you didn’t want to, you listened.

For now, you just remained in bed, staring absentmindedly through the open curtains. You’d heard your roommate leave for work a couple hours earlier but made no effort to leave your bed. In all honesty, you weren’t sure if you ever would, wanting nothing more than to slip into unconsciousness for the remainder of the overcast day. And you had full intentions of doing that until you felt your phone begin to vibrate from somewhere on the bed.

Debating to ignore it or not, your better judgement told you not to as you answered it right away without checking the caller ID.

“Hello?” you replied dully.

“Hi kitten” Hyunjin responded cheerfully. And just like that, the sound of your boyfriend’s voice was enough to bring a smile to your face as every negative thought slipped from your mind.

“Baby what are you doing?” you asked.

“Well, I was taking a break from practicing when I saw that it was raining and it made me think of you. So here we are” Hyunjin confessed, causing you to giggle quietly. The sound made Hyunjin grin wider as he proposed an idea.

“Are you busy right now?” he wondered.

“If you call ‘lying in bed staring at nothing’ busy then yes, yes I am” you responded in a playful tone.

“In that case, I’m gonna need you to get dressed, like right now” Hyunjin demanded. Your brows furrowed in confusion as you tried to figure out why he was making you leave the comfort of you bed.

“And why do I need to do that?” you asked curiously.

“Because my dear, you’re going to meet me at our place in twenty minutes.”

“Aren’t you practicing though?” you questioned.

“We’re taking a break for a while. Chan said to meet back in three hours.” You could hear the other boys’ chatter in the background, “Now get dressed.”

“It’s raining though, you hate the rain” you reminded him.

“Yeah but you love it. I’ll see you in twenty kitten.” You could practically hear the smile in his voice as he ended the call.

Taking a moment to recollect your thoughts, you threw the covers off of your body, instantly shivering from the cool air. Part of you wanted to tell Hyunjin to forget the plans so you could just stay in bed, but you also wanted to see your boyfriend and that part of you outweighed the first as you trudged yourself towards your closet. Slipping into your favorite pair of jeans, you grabbed one of Hyunjin’s sweaters that he’d left at your place and threw it over your head. Your hair fell in long loose waves over your shoulders, not needing to be fixed as you skipped the makeup and went straight for your purse. Slipping on a pair of shoes, you made your way out of the apartment. Yours and Hyunjin’s special place was only a few blocks away as you opted for walking rather than driving, wanting to enjoy the rain as your umbrella helped keep you dry.

The walk was rather peaceful, as most people avoided the rain, leaving the sidewalks somewhat empty as just you and a few others who’d braved the rain occupied them. Continuing on your way to meet your boyfriend, you let your thoughts take over. A gloomy feeling filled your body, leaving your steps heavier than they were moments before. You couldn’t understand why you felt this way. A minute ago you felt lighthearted as you thought about Hyunjin and your place, thankful to have these moments with him that always made you happy, and the next minute you felt empty, wanting to turn back and head home without interacting with anyone.

Before you could allow the negative thoughts change your mind, you stepped into the building, the bitter smell of coffee hitting your nose instantly. A smile appeared on your face, the atmosphere of yours and Hyunjin’s favorite coffee shop feeling like home. You made your way to your usual spot, sliding into the booth to wait for your boyfriend as you were a few minutes early. Your head turned to gaze out the window, watching as cars drove by in a flash. The rain continued to fall, much harder than it had been earlier in the morning. You were focused on watching the water droplets slide down the glass when a mug slid across the table to sit in front of you. You turned, meeting your boyfriend’s affectionate gaze as he slid into the booth across from you and smiled.

“What were you thinking about?” Hyunjin tilted his head to the side.

“Nothing in particular” you replied, siping the drink that he’d ordered for you. Spicy chai latte, your favorite.

“Y/N you didn’t even notice me walk by or come inside the coffee shop because you were staring at the window so hard. So clearly it’s not nothing” Hyunjin sighed.

Instead of responding, you dipped your head low, diverting your eyes from his intense gaze as you continued to sip your drink. Hyunjin reached across the table to place his hand on top of yours, making you look up at him. His gaze was sympathetic and his voice soft as he spoke.

“We talked about this Kitten, don’t bottle it up” he pleaded with you. You let out the breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding, as tears threatened to spill over.

“It’s happening again” you confessed, a single tear slipped from your eye as Hyunjin quickly lifted his hand to wipe it before it could fall any further.

“The nightmares?” Hyunjin asked. You nodded your head before continuing.

“The nightmares. The feeling of hopelessness. Not being able to sleep or eat. I’m exhausted Jinnie. It’s killing me and I can’t control it. I don’t know what to do anymore” you whispered, attempting to stop any more tears from spilling. You didn’t want to cry here in the coffee shop. You didn’t want to cry in front of him. You didn’t want to cry anymore.

“Kitten why didn’t you tell me? I’m here to help, you know that. Please let me help” Hyunjin begged you. It nearly killed him the first time you went through this but he was able to get you through it. He had no idea that it’d been happening again and he hated himself for the fact that he hadn’t realized, feeling like a terrible boyfriend while you’d suffered alone.

“You already have so much on your plate. Just let me handle this, it’s okay” you tried to reassure him but he wasn’t having it. He knew you needed him. With the mindset that you were in, there was no way you could do this on your own. He knew you hated feeling like a burden but he always made sure to reassure you that you were never that. He wanted to help you because he loved you with everything in him and he didn’t want you to hurt anymore.

You had finished your drink not too long ago as Hyunjin quickly downed the remainder of his before grabbing your hand to pull you from the booth. Confused was an understatement as you stumbled over your feet to keep up with your boyfriend.

“Hyunjin what are you doing? Where are we going?” you said in a hurry. Hyunjin tugged you out of the coffee shop, turning back at you to smile softly.

“We’re going to get your mind off things” Hyunjin stated. Instantly, you began to shake your head in refusal.

“No Hyunjin, you have to go back to practice soon. I’m fine” you rejected his offer but he wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“First of all, I know you’re far from fine and two, I already texted the boys to tell them I wasn’t coming back. They said it was okay so don’t start worrying” He pointed a finger at you when you opened your mouth to argue with him. “Kitten we’re spending the rest of the day together and you’re not going to argue about it. Now is there anything in particular that you want to do or do you want it to be a surprise?” Hyunjin asked you expectantly. You pondered the idea for a moment. There wasn’t any way you’d be getting out of this so you thought, why not make the best of it? You lifted your eyes to look at your boyfriend before biting your lip nervously.

“Can we go to that dog cafe?” you asked. Suddenly Hyunjin erupted into a fit of giggles, his reaction making you frown.

“Nevermind, you pick” you muttered unenthusiastically.

“Well I was actually planning to take you there Kitten” Hyunjin confessed, you joined him in his laughter.

“Then why are we still standing here?” you teased the boy. Hyunjin grinned brightly at you, grabbing a hold of your hand to lead you towards the dog cafe. Before he’d even taken three steps, he stopped and turned to you.

“Just promise me something first” he looked deeply into your eyes. You nodded, suggesting for him to continue.

“Don’t keep everything bottled up. If you do that, you’ll only feel worse. Come to me when you’re sad. Vent to me when it feels like it’s too much. I’m always going to be here for you Y/N so let me help you. You’ll never be a burden to me, I promise. I love you so fucking much and I just want you to be happy” Hyunjin said, gently placing his hands on your cheeks.

You knew he only wanted the best for you. And as much as you wanted to deny his offer for his own sake, you needed him.

“Okay” you replied, “I promise.”

A relieved smile crossed his features as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, pulling back to grab your hand once again. “Let’s go pet some doggos.”


End file.
